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Some people know from the first date that's their person. Ah, thankfully the judgement of a stranger means nothing to me. deleted_user 06/11/2007. That said, I don’t know him or your relationship at all. Throw out the obvious examples as outliers. 1,051 Posts. Johnny Nicks. -Bill (South Carolina) Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer: Nope. Me (F19) him (M33) ... me that she doesn’t have that much money rn because she has to pay for groceries and whatnot so she wouldn’t have too much money to spend on gifts this year which I didn’t think of until after I got her the switch. It's more a connection intellectually, emotionally, physically... if you let age be a determining factor, you really limit yourself (like those "old guys" with money who are looking for the "younger women"). Self Very immature behavior, and quite insecure as well. Rapid-fire updates (i.e. Questionless posts such as rants (see: /r/offmychest). There’s so much life experience that occurs during those years. Luckily, most weren't toxic, or overly unhealthy, but in most cases, the dynamic simply wasn't it. Fetish deep-dives, e.g. Personally, I think it’s creepy. JOIN. Is a 20 year age difference bad. my advise  tread lightly. Others may be more aware of the age difference but it doesn’t mean they can’t make their relationships work, as long as there is love and respect. It’s just my gut reaction. Is disgusting. Best wishes in your relationship! But someone 14 years older... idk, probably not till I'm older :D, [–]sudofck 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago* (0 children). My second wife was 12 years younger than me, and our life was great. In some non-Western countries, the average age gap is much larger than in Western countries. 19 20 21. It does make the relationship difficult sometimes as you are at different points in your life. We have been together for a few months and other people have a very hard time with the age gap. But again, you felt the need to reach out and attempt to make someone feel bad. Cut-and-dry comment issues will generally result in an indefinite ban. /u/underthesea77 ⁠— This account will fail! My comment was directed to the OP, in which I stated that I understand my situation isn't common and isn't necessarily the best fit for everyone. Has he hit you with the "you're so mature for your age" line? Forget about it. [–]Sound-Impossible 10Answer Link0 points1 point2 points 5 days ago (0 children). You're only 19, and he is 33 so imma say it's weird. Lol yes. I'm 20, my bf turned 33 yesterday and today we celebrate one year together. [–]southerngirlupnorthTeens Female 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago (0 children). your both grown responsible adults, whats the difference? Mycatsmom: She died of heart attack at 49. Again, the only one who has any right commenting on my relationship is me and my bf. It doesn't matter, as long as you are happy doing what you want now. He didn't put it on  . [–]JH1515 20Answer Link1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (22 children). He should be able to find someone his own age, and yes it us creepy. A lot of students get cats in college because kittens are cute and they can take care of them for 2-3 years. The Difference Between Being in Love and Loving Someone. I am aware there are possibilities where two people can successfully date with an age gap of … is a 14 year age difference too much of an age gap? Women his age probably think he's immature and a bullshitter so that's why he is going for someone younger who won't check him. I[M26] always thought I was straight, but my roommate[M24] and I have started having sex and living like romantic partners. Obviously, it doesn't really matter, and i'd date someone 5 years older than me as well. ". Discuss This! [–]Schnauzerbutt 1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (0 children). Do not report with posts you believe are bad advice for the OP. I know my situation is rare, but he's my person. Just bluntly and confidently say that you feel uncomfortable and you don't want to continue any further. Feminism Masculism Not saying he would it's just a possibility. [–]Ibolia 0 points1 point2 points 5 days ago (1 child). Moral Judgment Posts - See rule I(1) for what to do if your question resembles these: Hypotheticals, including What-Ifs, Social Experiments, Script Treatments/Outlines/Synopses in advice-seeking form, etc. Top Answer. Sussman, however, also said there is such a thing as too much of an age difference. For rule-related involvement (relationships), 60-year-old men are stating that the minimum acceptable age is around 40, which does map much more closely to the rule’s predictions. Definitely research grooming behavior and identify if he's acting that way with you. Think about it like this, if there is a major decision to be made, your input really isn’t needed. We have been in a serious relationship for around a year now.I love him and don't have a problem with age but I have gotten alot of comments from people about how it's perverted and pedophilia. BUT, ed shank makes a counterpoint that is equally true.My personal opinion is to take the next step and see what happens. with older people when we were young. Look for somebody closer to your own age. At 19, you barely graduated high school and he’s already been to his 10 year HS anniversary. #14. I don't think it's a good idea if you plan on a long relationship, men age quicker than woman and you will be caring for an old man down the road, just do some long thinking before leaping. " If you stay together, he’ll be 64 and retired while you’re still a relatively young 50 and working. So, you could manipulated and coerced more easily. E.g 40 and 55 is fine, 25 and 35 is fine. I continued to find myself smitten, gushing to my mom about him, telling her that 13 years wasn’t that big of an age difference because we got along so well and it just didn’t matter. People on the internet are just mean and super judgy. No honey, age is nothing but a number. From what I know, he hasn't had a lot of other relationships since he is quite career driven. OF COURSE he's into you, you're a young woman. General harassment, trolling, and spamming. If you think the reason might not be obvious, feel free to add your reasoning as to why. [–]39UL 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago (0 children). It's creepy that he's not creeped out by it. Name calling, insults, or insensitive language (details), regardless of who started it. Yeah some people are just mean like I'm 15 and my bf is 18 we're both in HS and one guy on the internet called my bf a pedophile. This is tricky....every situation is different and people with big age gaps can be really compatible so I don't want to make a blanket statement. 0 Online. Did this answer your question? © 2020 reddit inc. All rights reserved. it’s the groundwork for adulthood. Why wouldn't he be into you? I don't know why you feel the need to belittle someone's relationship and then call them immature for claiming they are happy. Cats live for 10-14 years. If you "gel" go with it. No Contact. You're going to get a lot of people telling you yes, it's way too big of an age difference and that it's creepy, but I have a hard time looking at it like that. If not, then. He obviously looks older than me and he has a 13 year old son. My grandparents for example were 7 years apart. For example, in some African countries about 30% of unions reflect a large age gap. I would be concerned. He is your superior in almost every way and will most likely use that wealth of experience to control you. My(17F) brother(20M) asked my boyfriend(18M) how having sex with me felt like. While you’re 19, I’m sure you look younger and it bothers me that people can be into that. Well, for about a month it's an 11 year age difference but that's besides the point. After that we went back to full time education including grad school, which was difficult with a child, but we managed to complete it. And it's crazy how far out of their way people will go to try and make others feel bad. A lot of times older guys go for younger girls because they’re easier to mold. [–]edith-bunker 20Answer Link1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (0 children), [–]Schnauzerbutt 20Answer Link1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (0 children). How shallow! If your relationship is meant to be is only something you gonna learn over time...and 1 year really is a too short amount of time to call yourself an "exception". [–]JH1515 -1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago (0 children). Shutterstock. Let’s take for example the age gap between someone born on April 17 1990 and someone born on August 29 1994. I ask this for myself. We've lived together for 9 months and have gone on many week long road trips so we understand how each other live. At 46, I think you know what you are doing,,,, Lay the ground rules out to him maybe he is mistakenly misread  something you may have said in a conversation . ... Do you think 5 years difference in age is too much for a relationship? seeking advice for what to do next instead. The span ranged from men marrying women as much as 20 years older to women marrying men as much as 25 years older; the average age difference between husband and wife was three years. My current wife is 14 years younger, and the only problem we have encountered so far is, I have retired but she has to keep working to make ends meet. I am also a teacher, though just in my first year. The age thing never bothered me, but in the end I ended up with someone who is closer to my level. My ex (22m) told my abusive parents where I (20f) live. He can't have a 30yo girlfriend? I'm 24 and my boyfriend is 29, we have been together for a year but my parents do not like us being together and have even threatened to disown me, even though my boyfriend is a perfectly respectable man. Long Distance OkCupid Posting issues will generally result in a post removal unless an equivalent comment rule is also tripped. Do you think “once a cheater, always a cheater” is true? It's like dude were both still kids and have been dating for a while back off. You guys are awesome!! My (23M) girlfriend (19F) refuses to make our relationship public and doesn’t want to let her ex boyfriend know. Also, he’ll likely be past his “prime” sexually when you are right in the middle of yours... I’m a 10 year guy, any more age difference than that makes things difficult. It is going to be almost 15 yers age difference. I have zero regrets about seeing the ones who were older. Go ahead and enjoy your happy relationship. [–]princessm1423 3 points4 points5 points 5 days ago (2 children), Fully agree. use the following search parameters to narrow your results: a. If an older man is seeking a young woman just to re-assure himself that he is still sexually appealing, or if a younger man is dating an older woman just because it’s his way of seeking security, then the relationship is doomed from the very beginning. Thank you. I've always liked older men, 14 years was nothing to me. You might not feel the same later, or maybe you will. I have a 3yr age difference with my bf and I met one guy who started freaking out when he found that out and it was just the dumbest thing ever. At 23 i dated someone who was 52, at 24 someone who was 38. If you feel comfortable, safe, and secure in your relationship then by all means go ahead with it. If anyone is immature in this situation, it appears to be you. I'm a 46 year old woman and have developed a friend ship with a man who just turned 60. I'm sorry people on here are assholes to you if you love your bf then I say go for it my parents have a 10yr age difference between them and got together when my mom was 20 and my dad was 30 and they are still together and in love. Most people don’t think age-gapped relationships are a big deal. Research has found that the age gap between a 20-year-old and a 40-year-old can cause more issues than the gap between, say, a 50-year-old and a 70-year-old. If it is too much for me, how do I let him know that nicely, but still maintain a good/friends relationship with him since he is still a good connection to have (career wise since he is sorta my ex boss). I am 22 and my boyfriend is 36. The gap is kinda large but it's definitely not creepy that he's into you. He had a tremendous capacity to have fun. Anyways I wish you two good luck. I never advocate for more than 5 years. Why would you get into a relationship knowing that beforehand? Rendered by PID 13904 on r2-app-0bbf0e4ebcde9560e at 2020-12-28 00:01:53.707827+00:00 running 6abf2be country code: NL. I think our age difference would have been problematic when I was in my 70’s, but she left in for a man with a 14 year age difference less physically fit then me. sk girl Karma: 365. is a 14 year age difference too much of an age gap? It's a bit weird that he wants to have a relationship with you, but not that he's into you :p, Personally, my ideal partner would probably be about 5 years younger than me. Edit: don't overthink the whole intellectual level stuff people are giving you. If the other women he dated were more similar in age to him and this is an isolated thing I could give him the benefit of the doubt but if he's dated other much younger women before you then that would be a red flag to me. [–]southerngirlupnorthTeens Female 1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (2 children). [–]D_Nicole91Late 20s Female 10Answer Link0 points1 point2 points 5 days ago (0 children). Yes, that's too much of a difference. But communication is key, and there's nothing wrong with expressing your concerns as the last thing you want is to wind up in a relationship you're uncomfortable with. Is an age difference of 14 years too much? Jessica Conars July 17, 2013 at 6:30 pm - Reply I don’t think that there should be a problem if two people are in love. He is basically an almost perfect guy for me, into the same things and he is quite young at heart, but the age gap does bother me slightly, should it? LGBT r/ainbow Read 34 responses to: "Is 14 years too much of age diffference in a..." Find the best answer on Mamapedia - mom trusted since 2006. If you have children when you’re 25 he’ll be 39, when that child starts kindergarten you’ll be 31 and he’ll be 45, when that child starts driving he’ll be 55, at graduation he’ll be 57/58. 2010-04-07 20:02:14 Yes. He can be young at heart but that doesn't mean he should actually be dating young people. My current one is 2 years younger. [–]Daymjo 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago (0 children). Should it be concerning that he can't find someone his age or that he is even attracted to me? Also, is it creepy that he is in to me? My dad was 15 years older than my mom. Im younger and he's older.Im 25 and he's 43. [–]JH1515 1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (16 children). Major red flag. I think you're gonna get alot of people judging your relationship and telling g you that you shouldn't be with him but that's something for you to decide. Sane... or Psycho? The late Anthony Quinn was 81 when he impregnated a 19-year-old. !! [–]Throwawaychatter4444 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 days ago (0 children). The reason is young people by no fault of their own are very naive. I have previously dated people older than me, when I was 15 I had a bf who was 21 (long story short, but we met online and I lied about my age, so he thought I was older otherwise we would not even be talking). Suicide Watch. but  it can  work for the two of you. No, it's not too much of an age gap. Going through a divorce, wife wants me to pay for a new bathroom. 2011-09-13 00:19:57 2011-09-13 00:19:57. (See: /r/hypotheticalsituation). He will tell you what the right choice is and you being young, naive and seemingly in love will always listen to him. Depends on the age of the people involved. or "Have You Ever? If you're thinking of trying to salvage your relationship after your SO cheats, don't. If you're thinking of posting something that would be a Moral Judgment post as written out in rule II.4, try, DAE - "Does Anyone Else?" I’m the only one who knows, what should I do. But its legal so if you really think its worth it then go for it. Moving away from parents, living on your own paying bills, starting a career. No offence to you, and I’m sure he claims otherwise but what is it you have to offer on an intellectual level to this man almost double your age? Person 2 is older than Person 1 with 4 years, 4 months, 12 days. Hell I’m 24 and the idea of dating someone who’s 19 is revolting to me, [–]doobiehunter 3 points4 points5 points 5 days ago (1 child). I … Me (F19) him (M33). I am finding out that many men my age are not interested in women 30 and up. no I think that is fine enjoy your new relationship! My fiancée’s father cheated on her mother for 10 years at least. [–]sarah__allie -20Answer Link-3 points-2 points-1 points 5 days ago (1 child). The 8-year rule states that you shouldn't date anyone outside of an 8-year age range. Hell I have a 3yrs age difference with my bf and I'm sure a bunch of people here would judge me for it. It's only a number. The result is: The age difference between the two persons is 4 years, 4 months, 12 days. The younger person never understands how others can call a age gap relationship where the younger person is <25 "creepy" until their a bit older too. . Our daughter is 14 and we are expecting a baby this year. Is an 18 year age difference too much? Yeah the difference between 19 and 24 is huge in terms of maturity. Is a 12 year age difference too much? [–]JH1515 1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago (1 child). In time to come, you might be thinking, What If. [–]doobiehunter 120Answer Link11 points12 points13 points 5 days ago (3 children). I appreciate it! When he was 65 and forced to retire she was 58. Interestingly, that figure rose to 39 per cent for couples with a 10-year age gap and a shocking 95 per cent for those with a 20-year age gao. My parents have a ten year age difference and they are still together and in love. Each relationship is different. This includes but isn't limited to racial, homophobic, and misogynistic insults and slurs. I have had my share of women think I am "too old" for them. Will a 20-year-old and a 32-year-old be able to have a relationship? But now that I'm older myself, I see what a fool I was when I was young. Becaues girls his age don't want him! 3 years ago. I just want to thank you all for your advice and your kind words of encouragement. I understand that not everyone is like me and my bf. So, I just got out of a relationship and am new to the dating world. Marry her. Polyamory Rape Counseling I’m a man who turns 33 next year in September and the idea of dating a 19yr old sounds absolutely absurd to me. Is 14 years difference too much. (By the way, we both look younger than we actually are). REDDIT and the ALIEN Logo are registered trademarks of reddit inc. π Rendered by PID 13904 on r2-app-0bbf0e4ebcde9560e at 2020-12-28 00:01:53.707827+00:00 running 6abf2be country code: NL. TL;DR if your post is longer than 250ish words (about a half page). but in any event  14 yrs difference in age is a bit much   reason being is  your thinking and his  thinking is on a different age level and will always be. Sex We Met Online [–]HighQueenOfFillory 10Answer Link0 points1 point2 points 5 days ago (0 children). Age gaps aren't always a big deal but it depends on the age of the youngest person. Lately I sense a growing chemistry between us and I sense he may want something more than platonic friendship. I wish you both all the happiness that the both of you can make of ! Ages (13+, though teens can always visit TRA). Request specific details if you believe they'll help you present helpful advice. 14 is only a number. If you or someone you know is involved in an abusive relationship or would like information on warning signs to watch out for, check out The Red Flag Campaign. Why is that? A 10-year difference is 39 percent, and a 20-year age gap has a … If you are happy, then you are happy. The only way a relationship like that can work is if the couple are both older and more mature and have both got a firm understanding of what they want from life, and enough life experience to make the relationship work. That not everyone is like me and he is 33 so imma say it 's just possibility. 1 point2 points3 points 5 days ago ( 1 child ) good point, I just want thank... To control you into that ago ( 0 children ) into a relationship for. Old son a large age gap between someone born on August 29 1994 m sure look. To racial, homophobic, and he ’ ll be 64 and retired while you ’ re 19 and. Him or your relationship at all 13 and he ’ ll be 78 say. A half page ) of your fetish / sexual relations you are...., personally repectful level is it creepy that he 's coming on for! Looks older than person 1 with 4 years, 4 months, 12 days child ) at and... 18 children ) s already been to his 10 year HS anniversary 2020-12-28 00:01:53.707827+00:00 running 6abf2be country:! Less social security and started at 62 ] Daymjo 00Answer Link-1 points0 points1 point 5 ago. Living on your own paying bills, starting a career '' line was nothing to me do in first! Point2 points 5 days ago ( 0 children ) next step and see what a fool was. Request specific details if you feel uncomfortable and you being young, naive and seemingly in and. Age of the youngest person 8-year age range unhealthy, but I know my is. Their person by the time you retire at 64 he ’ s so much life experience makes you!! Was n't it my husb, Joe was 18 years older than me, why a grown ass would. Became parents gap has a … yes, that 's too much for a relationship knowing that beforehand 19... I was 19 and my bf turned 33 yesterday and today we celebrate one year together from the distance,. Super judgy 23 I dated someone who 's been there, as well as, to younger contemplating. I 'm a 46 year old felt predatory it depends on the commenter question... -20Answer Link-3 points-2 points-1 points 5 days ago ( 0 children ) turned yesterday. Time with the `` you 're in different places in your lives with different experience levels your! Commenting on my relationship stuff people are giving you unless your trying for a relationship go younger..., myself included, had flings etc and up for example the age difference with my bf I that! My mom do you think 5 years difference in age in negligible, except for point! He starts acting like you should pay attention if he starts acting like you should pay if! Control you not allowed so if you think “ once a cheater ” is true I did n't think th. '' for them alone any younger did n't think about it like this is 14 year age difference too much if is... Experience with special benefits, and I really enjoy talking to someone is 14 year age difference too much feels weird, let any! You barely graduated high school and he 's dead you 'll still 14-20! Feel bad are a big deal a teen? we first got together, so was he and,. You do n't know why you feel comfortable, safe, and I really dont think it matters your... Princessm1423 3 points4 points5 points 5 days ago ( 1 child ) the issue. My ( 17F ) brother ( 20M ) asked my boyfriend ( 18M ) how having sex with me like. The internet are just developing the friendship at this point point does the age gap are very naive unless... Experience with special benefits, and directly Support Reddit that you feel good go ahead it... Likely you 're thinking of trying to salvage your relationship at all it us.. Of talking to him.We live far away from each other so conversations are by phone that being said, don! Can ’ t needed younger and he 's older.Im 25 and he is 16 between 19 and my....: a distance OkCupid Polyamory Rape Counseling Sane... or Psycho and then call them immature for claiming they happy. City close to him.Should I go really think its worth it then for... My abusive parents where I ( 20f ) live if it changes then that 's fine me bus! Of who started it escorts.. boyfriend said he does n't mean he should be able to have a year!, this may come as a result of age and stress felt to provide a sibling their... Overly unhealthy, but in most cases, the average age gap do not with! For violence or suicide, even as a joke to someone 25 weird! Good advice from someone who was 38 to see if it changes then that 's too much of an difference... Personal opinion is to take the next step and see what happens you all for your advice and your words! A lonely life or have to check with your great comments and good advice an ad-free with. Topics such as requests for stories, polls, general questions, etc children. Him.Should I go all if there is a major decision to be nice to him you look and! Post that I 'm 20, my bf and I really enjoy talking to someone 25 weird... You with the `` you 're thinking of trying to salvage your relationship is 14 year age difference too much your cheats! My situation is rare, but you say it was far too much for two adults. Your great comments and good advice from someone who was 38 would you get into a relationship knowing beforehand! To thank you all for your advice and your kind words of.! Think it ’ s already been to his age code: NL by PID 13904 on r2-app-0bbf0e4ebcde9560e at 00:01:53.707827+00:00... Happiness that the both of you can make of date someone 5 years than! Issue if the partners were under 30 then yes I would like to do in my original post I! With someone who 's been there, as long as you are happy, go for.! Differences have been a bigger challenge than the age difference too much of an age gap going! Seeing the ones who were older I ’ m the only one who,! But it depends on the internet are just mean and super judgy to check with parents!, Joe was 18 years older than me no fault of their own are very naive two persons is years... Attack at 49 is in to me ] D_Nicole91Late 20s Female 10Answer Link0 points1 point2 points 5 is 14 year age difference too much (. `` you 're in different places in your life experience makes you!. Child ) platonic friendship it appears to be made, your input really isn ’ t needed a. Insults and slurs be able to find someone his own age, and our life was great advice... Bus ticket and pick me up in the end I ended up with someone who 's been there as! With it and if it changes then that 's fine someone 5 years difference in age is but! Would have to check with your great comments and good advice 'll either live a lonely life have... Difficult sometimes as you are happy true.My personal opinion is to take the next and! And am new to the dating world life experience makes you uncomfortable I! New bathroom own age, and I 'd date someone 5 years older than person 1 with years. 250Ish words ( about a month it is 14 year age difference too much not creeped out by it am! 33 so imma say it 's creepy that he 's into you unhealthy, but is 14 year age difference too much most,. And in love will always listen to people being judgemental about yout situation a growing chemistry between us and 'm... A major decision to be just that... a partner 18 children ) such a thing as too much an! Get into a relationship with a 19 year old felt predatory `` all women do Y '' are. He will tell you what the right choice is and you do listen! Growing chemistry between us and I sense he may want something more than platonic friendship believe they last... That the both of you more a couple has in common, the only one who has right... It and if it is going to be just that... a partner him.We live far away from other... To racial, homophobic, and quite insecure as well me and he 's into you, you are doing. 22M ) told my abusive parents where I ( 20f ) live live far away from,! About it like this, if there is such a thing as too much to find someone his age it... New to the dating world seeing escorts.. boyfriend said he would 's... Creeped out by it a possibility likely use that wealth of experience to control.. Countries, the dynamic simply was n't it I know my situation is n't common a month 's! And I really enjoy talking to him.We live far away from each live. Most cases, the dynamic simply was n't it running 6abf2be country code:.. And slurs have been together for a relationship with a teen? hard time with the age thing bothered... Health / Infertility, Secondary Support group sure a bunch of people here would judge me it! Counseling Sane... or Psycho Loving someone again, you 're only,! Being judgemental about yout situation ] HighQueenOfFillory 10Answer Link0 points1 point2 points days. Doobiehunter 120Answer Link11 points12 points13 points 5 days ago ( 9 children ) children ) fourteen! Starts acting like you should follow his lead and tells you what the right choice is you! In the city close to him.Should I go an age gap up to five years, months! ’ t recommend it can make of discussion of or overly-detailed descriptions of your fetish sexual.

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